


Ai De

by Loopie_Lupie



Category: 47 Ronin (2013)
Genre: Chikara is sad, Drabble, Feels, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-23
Updated: 2015-11-23
Packaged: 2018-05-03 00:49:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5270300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loopie_Lupie/pseuds/Loopie_Lupie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A part of him had once questioned if perhaps some of the Samurai were right in claiming that Kai was a demon. If only he could explain away his unyielding hunger for the half blood’s attention.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ai De

**Author's Note:**

> Ai De comes from a song by Jin Akanishi's former bandmate Kamenashi Kazuya entitled 1582. It translates to "With Love"

Chikara had always known that Kai was an outcast for being a half breed. But as he grew up, it simply meant that he got the majority of the man’s attention. Of course Lady Mika held Kai’s attentions, but that did nothing to ease the thoughts or dreams that haunted the young man. He knew that his father suspected why it was he always found time to spar with Kai even though they both knew that he would never be a Samurai. Chikara claimed it was an attempt at bettering himself to be taken seriously in a few years when he could become a Samurai himself, but there was a part of him that was sure that his father saw right through it.

No, he spent all his free time sparring with the half breed because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t keep the man from invading his thoughts. A part of him had once questioned if perhaps some of the Samurai were right in claiming that Kai was a demon. If only he could explain away his unyielding hunger for the half blood’s attention.

If he could only have Kai’s attention when they were sparring than that was what he would take. It was, after all, better than allowing their house to be shamed by letting anyone know that not only would Chikara allow man of no worthy rank touch him, but that he would allow unclean hands of a half blood to touch him.

Instead he only let himself memorize the feel of Kai’s hands through the times the man helped him gain his feet again. He only let himself think of the feel of those hands when he found time for himself. Only let himself breathe the half breed’s name when no one could possibly hear the damning note pass his lips.

He had thought himself over his desire for the half breed after Kai was sold to the Dutch Island. He’d found himself uncaring of anyone in such a way. No one caught his eye, he wanted no one near him, no one to touch him. He’d thought himself cured of whatever sorcery had caused his obsession with the half breed gone.

But then his father had brought Kai back from the Dutch Island. Then he saw the darkness that lingered in Kai’s eyes now. The darkness that said he cared nothing for what anyone would think of him; that he would do what he so chose, to hell with the consequences. 

And the hunger Chikara had wished gone came back with a vengeance.

Any touch he gained from the half breed left him fighting the desire to ask for more. He had once thought he knew what it was to crave the touch of another, to want anything that was offered. He had been foolish to think he even understood what it was to _want,_ let alone **crave** another’s touch.

Now he understood how consuming it could be; he understood how Kai could be willing to walk to a sure death for Mika. For Chikara would walk the path alongside the half breed if only to never live a day without the man in his life. A simple glance made his knees weak and a touch could stop his heart, his tongue growing too heavy to speak for fear of begging for more than he should ever want.

He would give anything to have Kai want him, to touch him with more in mind than passing him or congratulating him. He craved the man’s touch upon skin, bare skin; wanted to feel all that the man had to offer. Sure, he knew that could he ever gain Kai’s attention that it would leave him bruised, the power and darkness in the half breed told of that. But it was all he could think of.

Swallowing that hunger, knowing it would never be filled, he told himself that he would find Kai in another life, in another time, and then he would have him. He would belong in full to the half breed then, his body to be claimed as fully as his heart already was.

It was with that thought that he walked into Nagato.


End file.
